running...

sometimes it's so hard...
sometimes it's so tough...
sometimes i really hate myself...
and sometimes i really hate the world...

maybe i am finding excuses...
maybe i am too stupid...
maybe i am too short-tempered...
maybe i should just retreat into another mask...

why is it so hard?
why is it so tiring?
why does it make me so angry?
why does it make me want to cry?

i am trying...
i am struggling...
i am sinking...
tears are pushing their way out of my eyes...

i will not cry...
i will not raise my voice...
i will not do things that i will regret later...
i will not say things that i know will hurt others...

maybe then everything will go away...
i know i am running...
all i want to do is to hide...
juz find someplace and never come out...
maybe i will be better as a recluse...
i am bad at handling relationships...
be it friendship or kinship...

but still i want to try...
let mi cry without tears now...
tomorrow... i will stop...
it will be a brand new day...

juz argued w my family... n in nid of letting out my feelings...
sorrie to bore ani1...